Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

Say, "I have a really nice knock knock joke, but you have to start." To someone. They say knock knock You say who's there! and walk away.

Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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