Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

Say, "I have a really nice knock knock joke, but you have to start." To someone. They say knock knock You say who's there! and walk away.

A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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