Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a black man was chasing his dinner.

A black man and a muslim enter a bar. The Black man pulls out a gun in an attempt to commit a robbery, however the muslim opened his jacket, screamed "Allah Akkbar" and blew himself up. Everyone died.

Feminism.

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air? A: She missed.

Did you hear about the guy who lost his whole left side??? Yeah he's all right now!!!

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

Roses are red, violets are blue, This is false, Violets are purple.

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

What did the 11 year old boy get for christmas? A wet dream

Knock Knock Whose there? The pizza you ordered That's weird, the Pizza I ordered shouldn't be able to talk

you know whats not funny white boards.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one. It should only take one person to demonstrate such a simple task, regardless of their hair color.

Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

[Set up] [No punch line]

I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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