Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

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Chris is hairy

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

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roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

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Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

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Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

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Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

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a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

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Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

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And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

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Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops