Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

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Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

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A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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