Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He had escaped from his farm and didn't understand the laws of jaywalking.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

So, a man walks into a bar. Suddenly, the universe around him cracks, unable to sustain the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

Man U

Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

I'm going to rewrite history. History.

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

Why did the boy kill his parents? Because he doesn't understand this joke either

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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