- Anti Joke

Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

Roses are red Violets are blue I don't know how to rhyme Refrigerator ------------

What do a black man and a dog have in common? They're both going to die some day.

Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

Why did Elmo get depressed? All his friends sacrifised themselves to satan

How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

Why didn't the Mexican kid go to school? Because he was sick.

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

What page are you on The gay page.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who can count and those who can't.

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Now this bible thing, is a real anti joke so get ready to have your faith tested, and overcome it: There was that story where God charged against an army at the top of some mountains, the army is told to have been led with God personally at the front rank right? But they lost because the enemy had horse wagons (you know what I mean) made of steel or iron, (does not matter what it is if you ask yourself really) I mean even if it was Metatron, he would have had uh... Wings or something to even the odds, Maybe God is like Raiden from Mortal Kombat, he needs to become a Mortal in order to enter fights on earth... MORTAL KOMBAAAT! I mean God made humans humans made Sin (gotta say we get the blame for a lot of shit others did, I hate apples and cant even stand the smell of them for once, never ate one)

Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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