What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

Roses are blue Violets are red Is that really What I just said?

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

what did the toe say to the other toe? nothing they cant speak

how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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