welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

thumb_up thumb_down -9

CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

scraggle is in you pillow case

thumb_up thumb_down -9

*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

thumb_up thumb_down -9

some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's black white and red all over? Steegers.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops