Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

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Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

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What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

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Nancy Kerrigan walks into a club

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9/11

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two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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Why did the Muslim cross the road? He was on fire and he needed to get to the lake on the other side of the street to put himself out.

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knock knock? who's there Dave Come on in!!!!!

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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