Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

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A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Tim. Tim who? Tim Smith.

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

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awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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