What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

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Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

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Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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What would you do if I jumped down your throat when you were talking? That would never happen, as it's impossible to even climb into somebody's mouth.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

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Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

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Why did the Muslim man burn the American flag? The flag had touched the ground, which, by tradition, means it has to be disposed. And the proper way of disposing it is by burning.

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Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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THAT'S RIGHT, BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER BOUGHT. LOOK WHAT A GREAT JOB IT DID ON THIS PAGE YEAH! I RECKON IT IS THE BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER DIDN'T SEE

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What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

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A Jew finally tipped He was in a canoe

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"Have you seen the food African kids eat?" "No.." "NEITHER HAVE THEY!!"

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What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

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roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

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A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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