What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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TRICERATOPS!

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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What did the Ginger get for his birthday? A soul...................................……................……………•

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

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what did the person with yellow teeth and the person with white teeth have in common? they have a nose.

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johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

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Whats green and has wings? grass, I lied about the wings.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops