A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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24

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

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b

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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Once a upon a time there were three kittens that die, the end :D

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

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Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

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A man with a barbie doll walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "I bet you $100 that I can turn this barbie doll into a beautiful lady". The bartender laughs and says "Okay." The man takes out a brush and begins brushing the doll's hair. Seconds later the man has a seizure and falls to floor a dies. It turns out he was a drug addict and had a fatal over dose. The bartender never got his $100.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops