Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

Hey! Have you ever heard of the Alzheimers joke?

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

What did the blond say to the other blond? "I like your shoes."

ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

A house comes around the corner.

What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

HOW MANY CRACK-HEADS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? NONE, THERE AIN'T NO ELECTRICITY IN THE CRACKHOUSE!!!

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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