What did the mother say when her sons asked for a can of pop? No you have diabetes.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

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What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? Someone else's cheese.

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denisssssssssssssss

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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A man comes into a bar. Wait, it's a horse. A man comes into a horse.

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why did Sallt fall off the swings? she had no arms knock knock who's there not Sally

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What's the difference between a Lamborgini and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

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Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

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knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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In this case, its black operations, but simply in the term that its a well secret something, its not a lets say, organization that breaks the law, kidnaps listens to phones uses wires, which the FBI does. And when I mean I am a employee, I might have spoken a bit over my head here (sorry, lightheaded), you could well, simply put, I am something between a delivery boy and a mercenary, not the kind that shoots and kills (my shape sucks anyways), but rather the kind that "facilitates" communications between organizations... Thats all I can say without breaking laws that technically do not exist.

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A man is at the dentists. The dentists says, "Oh my, your teeth are terrible!" The man says, "Yes I know. I am addicted to Meth".

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Why was a woman not considered in the role for a stunt driver? Because her skill level was not sufficient enough for the requirements.

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why did the boy die because he got ran over by a tractor

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what is a mix of a bull dog and a shih tzu. a bread of dog that has a shaggy face and long hair

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Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

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There is a wire, Let's put it on fire, The fire spread so did your legs, Now were both lying dead on your bed.

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BTW ANders she is gone, read below, seriously! And your mother is ugly, but she is so kind to me, so ill be nice to her too... Seducing a LONE WIDOW ME 32 years she... 180 and always blushing around me? Thats gonna be hard... No seriously, I kissed her on the cheek the other day, she moaned... And she aint that old... looks like a old 40 year old. ANDERS! AAAANDEERS! CHATTERTON!!! Anyway, tell your mom, that way Ill just need to enter, kill you, and you know... make her feel like she is ... 77 again? Nah she is ahornbag so she must be younger, wont kiss her on those lips though ANDERSSSss because she smokes, the others? Sure, Ill take a pic of her squirting! From the guy that taught you how to make any woman squirt... YOu fucking asshole!

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Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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how do u kill a blonde: drop something shiny at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 2 blondes: but a mirror at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 3 blondes: ask which 1 of them is the prettiest and then wait 5 minuetes:)

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http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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