Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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Eric is gay Ha

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roses r red violets r blue u jumped in the air and saw a planet to

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

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Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza is an Italian food and a jew is a human that practices the Jewish faith

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Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

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What did the boy say after he fell out of the tree? Nothing, he died.

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what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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Why was Emily in Alaska? Because she and some friends had been playing Simon Says at a birthday party, and the dad had said 'Simon Says go to Alaska'.

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops