What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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What's a bench painted red white and blue all over? An American BENCH.

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List of people I love: Hitler Stalin Mussolini Ted Bundy Charles Manson Hannibal Lecter Vladamir Putin Satan Justin Beiber One Direction Chris Brown Chris Brown's parents Oh, and my mother. I love my mother, too.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

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Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Once ther was a happy little boy and he was just playing with his dinosaur when he was hit by the school bus that was supposed to take him to school. The End

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops