Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

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Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

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What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

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there are three girls one said daddy why is my name rose because a rose fell on her head when yur a baby. daddy why is my name feather because a feather fell on your head when your a baby mumamhama, SHUT UP CINDER BLOCK!

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb??? I don't know don't ask me when I'm asking you the question!!!

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Why did the little girl miss 7 straight days of school? She died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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