*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who grants them three wishes. The brunette wishes to go back home. The redhead wishes to go back home too. The blonde misses her friends, so she wishes to go back home too.

A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

Why was Tommy late for school? He got raped by spiderman.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...