Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

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How do you get a fat man to go outside? Blow up his house

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Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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Whats green? Mountain Dew.

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"Is this the Krusty Krab?" "Yes it is, how may I help you?"

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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How many elephants can you fit in a mini? None. There are no affordable cars large enough to fit a fully grown elephant.

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What did the sleepy man say to his wife? I'm sleepy.

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why did the chinese man die because someone shot him

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curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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how does hitler drink soup ? with a spoon

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Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wristwatch! Wristwatch who? Orange ya glad I didn't say banana

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Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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