Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

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A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Knock knock I'M IN THE BATHROOM !!

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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an american walks out of a strip club.

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Roses are red , violets are blue, you like 1d? STFU

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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What did the boy reading a book do? He finished the book and took it back to library.

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

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I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

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What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

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What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

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Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops