What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

How did the man die? He was killed alive.

How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

who is gay wit mon james cornish

Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father! Luke: You're not my dad!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA PENIS

What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

Why are you gay? Because ***** you

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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