Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

What do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? A surgeon.

A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

what is yellow and burns? -a fire

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

what did the jew get for christmas? nothing Jewish people don't celebrate christmas

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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