what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

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two mormons missionaries knock on a door they are welcomed into the home and treated with kindness later the family is baptized. the mormons return home with a sense of accomplishment and purpose.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

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A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

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What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

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knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

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why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

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Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

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how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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