Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

thumb_up thumb_down +12

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Impossible, fruits to not have the ability to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops