So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

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How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

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A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

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What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would think the second man would have seen it. Made by Bobbie Pummel

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? alot of things, worms don't taste that bad.

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What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

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A Mexican got stopped by the police. Turns out it was a mistake and the man lived a happy life in America

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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What did the pregnant teen get for Christmas? A miscarriage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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