i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A Wii.

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Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

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If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

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Why couldn't little Billy fall asleep. Because Billy didn't have any counting skills to be able to coins sheep

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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What do you call the Flintstones if they were black? N****rs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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HOREY SHIT!! OMFG!! I win? Yeah I think so.. Wait. Why am I talking to myself.. Aww not again.. My doctor warned me about this.. D:

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Why did the boy get coal in his stalking. Cause he wants to be a geologist and that's what he asked for.

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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who is an indian that can not shoot a bow and arrow? David

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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