An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A dead zebra

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

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Get on the boat.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

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what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

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I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

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yo mamma's so fat you're fat too, because it's genetical

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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God saw himself. Finally, proof.

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Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

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Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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