Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like lead, I did a poo.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I? Everett

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Engage in a lively debate with a friend, and when they are about to stump you, respond to whatever they say next with "What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When Hitler was a girl she had hyjenical warts and when she got older she had beast cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? several.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops