- Anti Joke

Can yas all stfu SBBBBBBBBBSBSBSBSBSSBBSBSSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBBBBBB

What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

What do tigers dream of when they take a tiger snooze? Mike Tyson

Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

Your mother is so poor she doesn't have any money!

Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

Jesus on the cross promised he would return rite? So three days later he returns in ghost form and leaves. So why people still waiting for him? He returned and left already! (Lack of Moral?): The third coming: this summers blockbuster hit!

Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops