whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

What do you get when you put two landsharks together? Three landsharks.

what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

[Set up] [No punch line]

Why did the wheel fall of the car?? Cause you can't fit 10 pancakes inside of a doghouse.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

Knock, Knock whos there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society, so she returned to the kitchen and continued to make her master's sandwhich.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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