What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

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In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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whats funny about the klu klux klan? nothing is funny at all about it because they cause pain and suffering to afircan amaricans and other ethnic groups.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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What did the Golden Retriever say when asked about the meaning of life? woof.

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Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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women rights

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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