How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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The Labour Party.

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What is the answer to this joke? Cuz fuck you that's why.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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Whats 1+1? window!

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a blonde girl gets behind the wheel of a car. and drives to her community college for her morning class

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A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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What page are you on The gay page.

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Where does a jew with ADD go ? A concentration camp

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What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

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why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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