What do you think would happen if there was a zombie apocalypse? You would just die.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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Mommy, Mommy, I don't like Daddy! Well leave him on the side of the plate and eat your peas instead!

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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What did Reed read? A. Read?

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Robin, get in the car, please.

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Why did Anakin tell Luke he was his father? Because honest people never lie

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i did a 360 noscope, then i jizzed. from dylan

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

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A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

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A jew walks into a church. he wishes to be touched by God.

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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Boxing on Boxing Day

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haha

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"what's fat,stupid,and has a shell" "i don't know what" "you, i lied about the shell"

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realising the apple is the worm...

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What do you call a chicken who crosses a road? Nothing, its still a chicken

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shirt and blue, i call this one snow white, to score and seven years a jo, six samurai kageki, coral, 50 piece, specific frame, whats with that one, amy, hoption, smell my butt, smell my balls, smell my fart, smell my poop, urgay, pringles,

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What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

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A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops