What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

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What do you call a monkey lost in a desert? A donkey who was forgotten by his owner.

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Why did the man fall over? He was blind.

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What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

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What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

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what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

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What do you call a baby with a shadow? A shadow-baby!

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A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

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Connor is such a dope, he doesn't even know Betty White jokes aren't funny.

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thumbs up if you want 10 dollars to ya paypal.. email me @ sickguy42@hotmail.com

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

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In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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