Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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What happend to the chicken that crossed the road? He got hit by a truck.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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Knock,Knock Who's there? Afro Circus Ya get the fuk off my property!

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your best friend, and I'll always be there for you.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to probably balance himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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