Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

What starts with P and ends with ORN? Porn

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

What did jimmy get for dinner? Food

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

Osama bin Laden walks into a bar. Just joking, he's dead.

Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

Two men are talking: Bob: "Do you like fishsticks?" Joe: "Yes I do." Bob: "Your a gay fish."

What do you call 100 black men at the bottom of the ocean? A scuba group because during these hot summer months they like to cool off and go scuba diving.

Racial Equality

Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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