A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What did the fat man say to the Spaniard? Nothing. The Spaniard was skinny and so the fat man was jealous and shot him in the face.

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

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A man walks into an illegal brothel. He is a cop. He takes them back to the police station and questions them in a completely asexual manner.

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What is the best Anti-Joke ever? Your Mom. :(

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg. Chickens evolved from their pre-historic ancestors who each laid an egg with a slight genetic mutation until one egg contained what is now classified as the modern chicken.

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What's worse then finding a worm in ur apple? Nothing it sucks and it's a waste of an apple

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A cat playing laser tag.

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There's a priest, doctor, and blonde on a plane. At the end of the flight they all go their separate ways.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

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What did the ethiopian give his wife for her birthday? HIV

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What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

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You're a fat chubby McChubchub fatty fatchub because your fat chubby McChubchubfattychub poop is on your fatty fat Mcphat face of fatchubness because you are the fatty lord of McChubby fat kings.

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Q. Why do some people not like anti-jokes? A. They don't find the humor funny.

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

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The Pope, a Rabi and an Islamic religious leader go into a room and come out with what? A new understanding of each others cultures.

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knock knock who's there? pizza man ok

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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