A man is mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he reaches down to see if something's stuck in the blades. What does he pull out? His finger.

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RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

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What do you call a black jew? Overcooked

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How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

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What's red and sweet and good to eat? A riddle that rhymes.

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

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Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

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Q: What Would Canada Be With out Nature A: Peru

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What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

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What do you call a mother cow? Moooom

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Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

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Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot... are you racist?

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

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What's got four legs but can't move by itself? A chair.

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Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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