Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

There's two muffins in an oven, the first muffin says "Woah, it's really hot in here!". The second muffin says "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

Mary had a little lamb And a side of fries.

Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

Why did the boy kill his parents? Because he doesn't understand this joke either

knock knock who's there? your destiny

What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

want to hear a yo mama joke sure Your dad

A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

what do you give a little girl with no arms no legs and who lives in a orfanidge for christmas?.................................... nothing because no parent wants a freak kid

Knock Knock.. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Daves dead. This is Darrell.

What do you call a Mexican without any arms or legs? A bean.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...