- Anti Joke

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

Face...the other white meat!

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

A unicorn, a smart blonde, a dragon, and a hobo are in a maze who gets out first? The hobo. The other 3 don't exist. By Adam Chebali

Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why was the Mexican stopped at the border? He forgot his passport.

what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

What do you call a rich black person? A: Oprah

Why did I get thumbs down from everyone? Answer: Because they hate my anti-joke.

Man U

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.