"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

thumb_up thumb_down +4

9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how did the blonde get a concussion? she didnt see the pole in front of her.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

sky silverstein

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An overweight person falls down the stairs.. They had to be taken to A&E as they suffered very serious injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops