What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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DON’T HIT KIDS!!! NO, SERIOUSLY, THEY HAVE GUNS NOW. Via: Pingzic collection of Funny WhatsApp Status

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What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

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Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

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Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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how old is god? i don't know thats why i'm asking you. by: Brennan pickrell

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it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

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Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

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why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

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Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

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Billy was taking a stroll in the forest, when suddenly he met a bear. Billy remember what his father had taught him, and quikly lied down on the ground, pretending to be dead. The bear started licking Billy's face. Still he remained calm. The bear bit off Billys finger. Still he did not move. When the bear ate Billy's foot, he nearly panicked. But thinking of his wife and children he mustered his last remaining strenght, and did not move a muscle. If he tried to run or fight the bear he would surely die and never see them again. Then the bear ate Billys head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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