A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school today? Because it is Saturday

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

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HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You were probably expecting a poem or something but no this is just a gardening fact

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Q: Why did the little Canadian girl start crying ? A: Because her mum through a fridge at her.

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

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Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

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What would Micheal Jackson do if he were alive today? THRILLER! THRILLER! THRILLERS NIGHT!

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A man walks into a bar with a frown. The bartender asks, "Why are you sad." "My wife got brutally raped then shot last night."

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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him? Because that would be assault, and not only assault but aggravated assault, since you are using a weapon to do it. Plus, the lawyer would have an advantage over you in court during the trial, due to having a law degree.

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"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

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Your big dick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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