A blonde walks into a bar. That's it.

If you have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris now has $10.

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

Feminism.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

i just pooped that is all!

whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

Whats the difference between a Cadillac and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

A man walks into a bar he said oww when did this metel bar get here

A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

A woman tells her boyfriend that shes going shopping. Later that day the boyfriend sees her in an alley giving a blow job to a stranger so he says "What are you doing here?"

what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

What's more easier to break than a thin stick? A woman's neck.

What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

YOUR MOTHER IS SO FAT that she sought a relevant support group. My understanding is that she tried Overeater's Anonymous and lost a few pounds, but it meant more that it improved her sense of self-worth. She's more comfortable with herself as a somewhat overweight woman, and a much happier person now. We're all very proud of her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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