How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +26

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

thumb_up thumb_down +24

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Hey how is your wife and my kids

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the sign say? It said slow down

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the blonde die? She was slurped up by a 1,000 foot anteater.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? I don't know, why don't you go ask him?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Hats better than a stick? A stone

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Hi im a joke i eat turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he wanted to impress his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what did the man say to the other man? hey

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops