A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

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what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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The guy told a funny joke. Why wasn't the other guy laughing? Because he was having a heart attack

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Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

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knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

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What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

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A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

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why did the chicken cross the road, but didnt make it he didnt cross it. he was pushed by a band of gang members and hit by a bus

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

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how did harry styles get in one diretion god

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What did the wife get her husband after he became a paraplegic in a car accident? Divorce papers.

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops