Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

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What is more disappointed the Lake Disappointment? You

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm locked in someone's basement, Please help me.

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school? Both of his legs were amputated. He can't ride a bike ever again.

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why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

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Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

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What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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