Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

When there's something strange in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call? The Police. There's something strange in your neighborhood.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you stop an African outlaw who uses child soldiers? Angelina Jolie

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black elephant? An elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black person who has fallen? an ambulance

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why does the man appear fat he is

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's large and blue? Probably quite a few things.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Huh? Whats wrong? Why are you mad at me for? Its my name, it has always been so.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops