How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

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I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

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What does Chuck Norris order at a coffee shop? Coffee.

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Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

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What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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What did the boy say before he died? I'm dying.

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OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

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What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

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Why did the Cross chicken the road? Because it wasn't the way to the Lord

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A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

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There was a a round house with no corners.How many corners were there? 100 ,I never said that that it had to be that house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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