whats the worst kind of homework? child abuse

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's big and grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A few people were put in a room with 5 doors and 4 were a certain death one was freedom and they had to choose a door to go in not knowing which was freedom the first person went in the door on the far left. He got raped by Michael Jackson. The second guy opened the door on the far right. He got in a room entirely made of ice cream. He ate all of it and got such a brain freeze his brain froze. The third and final guy turned around and noticed a door labeled exit. He exited the room and continued his life as a normal person

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the Iraqi airline crash? The pilot was a tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you kill a ninja? Shoot him with a sniper rifle from a building. How do you make sure he's dead? Shoot him twice.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse than tripping? Getting shot

thumb_up thumb_down -3

"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Pickle

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A Jew walks into a bar, he buys it.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Wanna hear a joke? What? Life.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call three black guys in a bar? A bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops